G, You cannot "fill yourself" with genuine love-light. First of all, you (not the you that you think you are, but the you that you are) are already love,...however, as you have not observed that, you are viewing your reality from the dream-self. The self that can observe the truth is the real-self. Imagine what you wish,…but the separate-self cannot view the truth.
Your support of the false, and encouragement for those who proselytize what is meaningless, shows that you have little interest in the non-separate self, what Buddha (mahanirvana sutra) called the permanent self. To keep belief alive, the separate-self (ego) must deny truth. This why you have never responded to truth of my posts, but merely spew against the messenger.
Personally, a discussion with someone on the Long Path regarding what they read about Vajra is like tossing pearls to swine. Vajra is only understood from the Short Path.
Pointing ego-self to the Short Path is like suggesting the ego to surrender. The ego-self cannot surrender,…surrender merely points to what ego is not. What ego is, is that which praises the dream and things of the dream.
You are love,...but the self you imagine yourself to be wishes to maintain itself as a separate self.
V